Last night my leg was hurting and I wasn’t feeling so hot, so I got into bed at like 9pm and played some Plants vs. Zombies - (yes, apparently it is the only game I ever play on my DS anymore) - while a Law & Order: SVU marathon was on in the background. I fell asleep and I dreamed that Justin Verlander (the Detroit Tigers’ star pitcher) was leading an investigation team of other baseball players - (they were all in their baseball uniforms and there seemed to be one from each of the American League teams, I saw a White Sox and a Yankee there for sure). They were investigating a senior citizen orgy ring. Yes, you read that correctly. Justin was telling them all what they need to do (clearly he was the chief) and then the Yankee guy was like, “We can’t quit now! Justin’s right!” and even in my dream, I was like, “Stop being a suck-up, Yankee.” But then Shawn & Gus showed up to help them solve the crime. They had to go to Shawn’s dad’s house and they locked themselves in the bedroom and when Henry asked what they were doing in there, they told him they were building a bird whistle for bird watching. Henry told them that he was an avid bird-watcher and he would help, but when he went in the bedroom, Shawn and Gus had climbed out the window. Henry was so sad nobody wanted to build bird whistles with him. I felt bad for him. Then Gus told Shawn he needed to get a real job. I’m thinking, “Dude, you are helping baseball players solve sex crimes! What’s awesomer than that?” But that was the thought that made me go, “Oh, this is clearly a dream,” because I woke up then.
So what this dream shows us about my inner state of mind is…a) It’s baseball season in October! and b) I fell asleep watching Law & Order: SVU and c) all my sister does is lament how Psych is not coming back until February!
Look, USA Network, when you pushed Psych from a summer show last year to the fall, you told us all the summer was a better place to premiere a new show (curse you Suits!) and that Psych fans were loyal and would follow it anywhere. This is true and we did. But now you’ve pushed it this year from the fall until February and this will not stand! Yes, we are a loyal bunch but lest you forget, Psych fans are also the people that put USA Network’s original programming on the map in the first place. All these other shows you are pushing Psych aside for now? You wouldn’t even have them without the awesome stylings of Shawn & Co to begin with! (Monk fans too, but that’s not my point right now).
Go screw yourselves, USA Network, you’ve made my sister sad.