Title: Mistletoes - Gonna Keep On Waiting
Author: The Artful Dodger / dodger_sister
Fandom: CW RPS
Category: AU, Fluff, Romance, Holiday
Characters/Pairing: Jared/Jensen, Christian Kane, Padalecki & Ackles clans
Summary: Jared is not above using the holiday tradition of mistletoe to catch Jensen’s attention.
Word Count: 1,992 words.
Date Written: 12/18/14
Disclaimer: Jared and Jensen are not mine. I wrote this fic, just for fun. It’s the holidays, don’t sue!
Feedback: Bring it. dodger_sister / TheArtofDodger@comcast.net
Author's Notes: Part of my Mistletoes ‘verse, all written as holiday gifts for my Flisties. This one kind of got away from me with the word count. Apparently I still love a good AU!
Dedication: For denig37, who gave me a ton of great prompts, but this one - J2, kissing & catcalling - flowed off me like lava, baby! Merry Christmas, babe!
Jensen’s family had moved into the neighborhood when Jared was six and Jensen was eight. Their mothers had become best friends practically overnight and they had been having joint Christmas parties ever since.
Jared and Jensen had always been friendly with each other, despite the age difference. At school they had their own friends, but around the neighborhood they ran with the same group of boys and whenever their mothers got together, they’d head to the living room to play Hot Wheels and Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. Jared had always liked Jensen and Jensen had never snubbed Jared, not even when he entered junior high and Jared was still a lowly elementary school boy.
Jared was thirteen the first time he’d touched himself and thought of Jensen. He’d avoided the other boy for weeks afterwards, too embarrassed to look his friend in the face. That was until his mother called him out on being rude and Jared had had to suck it up and spend the afternoon helping Jensen rake leaves.
In high school, Jensen had started running with the crowd that thought it was funny to throw things out of moving cars at people’s mailboxes and Jared had kind of lost interest. The bad boy thing just didn’t do it for him. But then Jensen had gone off to college and his first summer home he suddenly seemed bigger, broader, more mature. Like a man and not a silly adolescent boy, which was what Jared felt like in the face of Jensen’s suddenly new interesting self.
It was different now though. Jared was twenty and living at home while commuting to the state college an hour away, three times a week, for classes. Jensen had just finished his last semester of college and was taking a year off before heading to graduate school. Jensen was better looking than Jared had remembered, having not seen him since the previous year’s Christmas party. The rest of Jensen’s body had caught up to his shoulders and his new short haircut made him look less like a member of a boy-band and more like the college graduate that he was. Jared still felt gangly and not filled out yet, but he’d grown his hair long, almost to his shoulders, and had been working out regularly at the school’s gym.
‘This has to be the year,’ he’d told himself the night before the party. That was all well and good as a statement, but the execution might be harder than he thought. He’d started with his tightest sweater and then took it off, already anticipating his little sister calling him ‘Calvin Klein’ or some other such thing. He’d spent an hour trying different things with his hair, until it was so matted with gel and spray that he looked like a poodle had died on his head. He’d even tried eyeliner and immediately given that up upon poking himself in the eye.
There was no way not to be obvious about it - and since Jared’s dog was the only one who knew of his crush, he was going to be humiliated no matter what he did - Jared eventually decided to hang a mistletoe in the doorway between the kitchen and living room, where it would get the most traffic, and position himself just off to the side of it, in the hopes of catching Jensen unawares.
If it backfired, he could shrug it off on good humored Christmas pranks and then go to his room and die a slow death.
Jensen’s family arrived a half hour before the party, to help set up, and Jared was stuck on oven duty, while Jensen was sent outside to shovel snow. Jared had a good view of Jensen from the kitchen window, so it wasn’t the worst chore ever.
When he came in, Jensen greeted him with rosy red cheeks and a wind-bitten nose. He shrugged off his jacket to reveal he was wearing a hideous red sweater with Rudolph across the front. It was utterly ridiculous and yet Jensen looked so adorable in it that Jared could barely take his eyes off him.
Jared readjusted his own red and green striped Christmas henley and hoped that maybe, just maybe, Jensen would notice the way his chest had filled out since last year.
“First guest is here,” Jensen said and Jared snapped out of his daydream of soft, slow kisses under the mistletoe to see Mr. Frank - the church’s choir leader and Mackenzie Ackles’ voice teacher - arriving at the front door.
“Showtime,” Jared said and as subtly as possible, arranged himself as close to the mistletoe as he could.
This move would backfire on him right quickly.
The first person to pass through the doorway and notice the mistletoe hanging there was Jensen’s mom.
“Oh, mistletoe!” she exclaimed and then turned around to see Jared standing there, the closest person at hand.
“Come here, little man,” she said and Jared rolled his eyes, because he’d shot up taller than her by the time he was eleven.
He went over anyways - no one was brave enough not to do what Mrs. Ackles told them to - and leaned over to lightly kiss her cheek. She’d clearly already been dipping into the Christmas cider because she turned her head at the last second and kissed him, soft and sweet, right on the lips.
“Oh, no, don’t let Alan catch you,” she said and then giggled, before trotting off to the kitchen.
Jared turned around just in time to see Jensen saluting him with his beer from across the room. Jared turned what had to be a hideous shade of red.
Jensen’s obnoxious friend, Christian, was the next to take Jared up on his offer - not that it was a offer for him - when he stopped dead center in the middle of the doorway and said, “You know, Jaybird, you’ve grown up quite nice.” Then he yanked Jared forward by his shirt and went straight for his mouth.
Jared froze, because a) he didn’t know Christian liked dudes and b) there was no way he was letting that man’s mouth anywhere near him. Thankfully, Christian pulled back at the last second, laughed hysterically like it was the best joke ever, and went to the kitchen for more beer.
Jared’s dad came next. When he stopped to rebalance his plate of food right there in the doorway, several people shouted out, “Kiss, kiss!”. They may have all been drunk as well. Jared’s dad rolled his eyes, but let Jared lean over and peck him on the cheek and steal a meatball from his plate.
Ms. Lancaster - the head of the neighborhood watch, that Jared’s mother had always said just started the group because she was nosey and a busybody - came next and Jared had no doubt she did it on purpose. Several people shouted out, “Kiss, kiss,” again and Ms. Lancaster acted all shocked and affronted before saying, “Well, it is the holidays, I suppose.”
Jared kissed her like one kisses their drunk aunt on Thanksgiving, but Ms. Lancaster tried to draw it out by clutching to the front of Jared’s shirt. Jared pushed her back slightly and smiled down at her as graciously as he could.
After that he decided it wasn’t worth it, he’d just switch tactics, and so tried to move positions, but Christian shouted at him to, “Get back there, son!” and Jared’s mother gave him a look that said he had better do just that. Apparently, it had become a thing now.
The mailman kissed him next - on the neck, because the mailman was short and that was as high as he could reach - and then the neighborhood yoga teacher, Misha, who actually kissed him square on the lips and if Jared wasn’t so head-over-heels for Jensen, he might have followed up on that. He snuck a peek at the love of his life after Misha’s kiss, just to see his reaction, but Jensen was busy whispering something to Christian. Whatever it was had Christian laughing and Jensen scowling and Jared figured neither of them had even seen the kiss anyways.
The local dog-walker - who walked Harley for Jared when he was in classes all day - stopped to give him a kiss, but instead of an actual kiss, she produced a small bag of Hershey’s kisses from her pocket and winked at him. The elderly lady from across the street, Mrs. Vance - whose husband had died earlier that year - gave him a soft kiss on the mouth and then laughed. “Most action I’ve had in years,” she said.
Jared’s mother came over, well into her own cider as she was, and pressed a kiss to his cheek and then made him dance with her around the room.
Finally, Mac - Jensen’s little sister, all of sixteen now - came over.
“My turn,” she declared and pulled Jared down to her.
Jared was smiling when their mouths first touched - because it was ludicrous to think of kissing someone he used to babysit for - but when she tried to slip him some tongue, Jared gasped, shocked, in response. This, of course, made his mouth open and she went on ahead and slipped her tongue in, tangled it with his own.
Jared finally regained his mind and pushed her back gently.
“I don’t…I’m not…” he stammered out.
“It doesn’t count, you’re gay, right?” she said.
Jared rolled his eyes. “It still counts, Mac,” he told her.
“Pity,” she said and skipped off to the kitchen.
When Jared turned around, he found Jensen standing right there.
“Enjoy yourself?” he asked.
“Not really,” Jared said. “Not the right body parts for me.”
“Me either,” Jensen said and then coughed and turned red when Jared just raised an eyebrow at him.
“Plus, she’s your sister.”
“Yeah, plus that,” Jensen squeaked out.
Jensen looked sour and grumpy - which was kind of an adorable look for him - but when he took a step toward the kitchen, Jared reached out and grabbed hold of his arm.
“Hey,” he said and when Jensen turned around to look at him, Jared promptly forgot what he’d been going to say.
They stood there then - Jensen under the mistletoe and Jared holding onto his arm - staring at each other.
“Kiss, kiss!” several people shouted out.
“Oh, for the love of all that’s holy, just kiss already!” Christian shouted at them, clearly drunk off his ass.
“Damn straight,” someone said and Jared froze at the realization that it was his own mother.
“The crowd demands it,” Jensen said, eyes locked onto Jared’s own.
Jared swallowed hard around his fear and leaned in. Jensen met him halfway and their mouths were wet and tasted like cider and meatballs, but when Jensen reached up to cup the back of Jared’s head, Jared lost all sense of the world around him and just went with it. His hands went straight to Jensen’s hips and he pulled the other man in closer, let Jensen tilt his head a bit more and open Jared’s mouth with his tongue. It was heady and Jared staggered, ending up with Jensen pressed back against the doorframe, Jensen thrusting his hips up against Jared with the slightest of pressure. Jared moaned into it and then the world came flooding back to him.
The catcalls were ear-piercing and there was a noise like elephants applauding and someone shouted out, “How many years did that take?”.
“I want to die right now,” Jared mumbled against Jensen’s mouth.
“Not a bad way to go though,” Jensen said and leaned up to press another light kiss to Jared’s lips. “Merry Christmas, Jared.”
“Indeed it is,” Jared said with a rush of breath and then they were kissing again and the mistletoe broke free of its scotch-tape restraints and floated to the ground.