About a month ago my mom hurt her back and was in screaming agony and we took her to the ER and they said there was nothing wrong, she just had a UTI, that's all and they sent her home with no pain meds, just some muscle relaxers. She stayed with us for three days because she couldn't even sit up on her own and then we took her to her doctor on Monday and he was like, "For the love of God, go to the hospital!" It took them a couple of days, but eventually they found a break in her sacral spine, which is basically the connector of your spine to your hips and your pelvis. She had been having lowkey back pain all summer and they also found some slightly healed hairline fractures, probably what had been bothering her all summer, but her regular doctor - who is a terrible doctor - just kept telling her it was arthritis and giving her steroid injections - which is actually the worst thing you can do for brittle bones - never sent her for an x-ray so eventually one of those hairline cracks turned into a full on break.
But they were right that she had a massive UTI because she eventually started peeing blood. She also had pneumonia from being laid up in bed with the broken back, so they eventually sent her to a live-in rehab center for her back. Then she started running fevers so they sent her back to the hospital where they did like one test, said there was nothing wrong with her, and sent her back to rehab. This went on for about 48 hours, the hospital booted her twice in one night when she was running a fever of almost 104. They kept trying to send her back to the rehab and the rehab kept sending her back to the hospital. Which, of course, all that bouncing around was terrible for her back.
So eventually we reached the point where she was in the rehab and she was sleeping nonstop for three days and they couldn't get her to eat or drink. Labwork showed she was infectious, so we sent her back to the hospital. This was on September 12 ,the day after her 69th birthday, and when she got to the hospital this time she was basically on death's door, so they finally took her seriously and did all of the tests until there was an answer, which is that she had an infection in her gallbladder. But by that time they'd let it go for so long without actually looking for the infection, that it was too late to remove her gallbladder, because she was too weak for surgery, so they put a drain in to drain some of the infection and that seemed to be working.
But the next day she had a sugar crash, down to 11, and she slipped into a coma for most of that day. She eventually came to, but the next day she coded and they resuscitated her, because she still had a standing order from her heart surgery that said she wanted all measures taken to save her life. Because of the amount of pain she was in, they put her into a medically induced coma for a couple of days. Then her white blood cell count got better and the pneumonia and uti started to clear up, and they took her out of the coma and she seem to know where she was, nodding and reaching for people. They took her off the vent too. She wasn't really interacting with people but she would ask for things like water.
The family had a meeting with the doctor who basically said because she never had a proper diet because of her other disorders, she never took care of making sure she got nutrients, that she was too sick to fight the infection and because for the last three weeks she didn't eat or drink, just slept, she was extra weak. We had already signed the basic DNR, but after that meeting we checked all the boxes, including not to put her back on the ventilator. At this point we just want to keep her comfortable.
Last night she was actually lucid and knew everybody, knew where she was and what going on and she said she was ready to die. This morning my sister said she was the most clearheaded she had been in weeks and again reiterated that she's ready to go. So they took her off of everything except for 2 liters of oxygen and a morphine drip to keep her comfortable.
Now we're just waiting, it's just a matter of hours, as soon as her lungs get too tired to work on their own, that'll be the end. Unfortunately because she is infectious and I am on auto immune suppressors, I haven't been able to see her since she went to the hospital. Both my brothers, my sister and my aunt are all up at the hospital with her though, so she won't be alone and scared at the end.
And I swear that's only a quarter of the story, so much has gone on in the last month, Mom has been through so much, and us in turn. I just don't want her to suffer. I'm going to lose my mom, but I just don't want her to suffer. Thank you in advance for all your support and kind thoughts.
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