I dreamed that I was babysitting wee!Dean and wee!Castiel (or they were my kids or my brothers or something) and they invited someone to stay the night. I had to tell them they can't just invite people over without asking. But then the kid was all "But I brought Smallville on DVD for you to watch while we play cars," and I was like, "Smart-ass" and took his DVD offerings.
So, then Dream-Me watched an episode where Jason Teague had to save some kid and he was at this waterfall and got all wet in this real nice blue t-shirt and had to strap himself with a rope and climb these wet slippery rocks. That was nice.
Then Dream-Me watched an episode where Clark was taken hostage by these Evil!People who had this camp of tents set up. I guess Clark was all powerless because he couldn't get away. Chloe was there but she was Evil!Chloe, which actually all seemed very much like something that may have happened on the show.
Then Lex showed up to rescue Clark but he got caught by some guards. Also, seems like something that may have happened on the show.
So Lex had to convince Evil!People that he hated Clark and was just there to seek his revenge (you know, so they would trust Lex and leave him alone with Clark long enough for them to escape).
So - and now we go into a place I don't think the show ever went but clearly, should have - Lex started back-handing Clark and then molesting him in a way that really left nothing to the imagination (good job brain!).
Evil!Chloe's eyes were all bugging out and she seemed very happy about it all (as she should be). Clark was all "Lex, I thought you were my friend,", in his stupid-Clark way of not understanding things. Lex was like "Yeah, keep protesting, it'll totally make them believe it" and then Clark finally got it.
And I thought "Hmmm, I think Lex and Clark and Evil!Chloe are about to have some hot Evil!Tent!City threesome sex. Nothing like threesome tent sex to make an episode complete."
And just then Dream-Me was interrupted from watching the best episode ever, by smart-mouth little kid being like "Do you like your Smallville I brought you?" and Dream-Me thought "Yes, but I haven't checked on Little Dean and Little Cas in awhile. Perhaps I...wait, Little Dean...and...Jason Teague...and...this must be a dream."
This must be a dream.
The statement that comes at the exact second my brain makes the logical conclusion that this reality is false and therefore, I must wake up.
Which I did. And then realized that episode never actually happened and I would be deprived of what I can only assume would have been the best threesome-tent-sex ever. And once again, my stupid brain has robbed me of porn.
Stupid brain and its inevitable and logical conclusions.
Man, I wish that had been an episode of Smallville. I bet they came really, really close to something like this, but I'm pretty sure if Lex ever actually bit Clark's neck, I'd have seen that clip by now.
Stupid, logical brain.
Although, look! My dream inspired me to make my first icon of my very own. Cuz I really needed a Rosenbaum icon to go with this dream. Yum, Michael.
That is all.