dodger_sister (dodger_sister) wrote,
dodger_sister
dodger_sister

Update.

Hello, flist people.

I just wanted to let you know that my eye surgery went very well.


They had two different options to try. Obviously, they were going to start with the ideal option and if that didn't go over, move on to option number two.

Well, they got option number one to work - (it had to do with how they secured the lens in the eye, so obviously we want the one that will be least likely for me to ever have to redo this bitch again.) And it went in very well and they had no problems and told me many times how well I did.

I guess people freak out a lot during those things.

Anyway, I have never seen so many doctors smiling like that after a surgery. It kind of creeped me out in a pod person sort of way.

Then I came home and slept for the entire day of Thursday, and then went in for my post-op checkup on Friday morning, where they informed me that my eyesight was better than it had been before the surgery. The doctor seemed quite shocked by this, considering it hadn't even been 24 hours.

For the first few days I just felt sleepy and it hurt to hold my eye open for too long, like the muscles were sore around my face. It really felt like Jared had been going to town on me - (Ha! Sorry, that sounded dirty). But by Saturday night, I was feeling more like myself, I was just insanely bored, since it still hurt to hold my eye open for too long and so I couldn't read or write. You know I was bored - I willingly put away my clothes. /gasp/

Now my eye just stings a lot when I over-use it, so I'm trying not to do that. And to remember to take my eye drops four fricking times a day. I go back on Friday for a re-check, but I can already tell the difference.

Also, every night and every morning I have this bizarre feeling like I am forgetting something hugely important and then I remember...No More Contact Lens. It's been a part of my daily check list since I was six, so I feel all weird when I get into bed because I can still see. It's kind of awesome.

The only bad thing was the nurse said to me, "We don't want to use too much sedatives, it will constrict your breathing. But we want to use a little, since you will be awake, we need you relaxed."

And I said, "That's good, the less of that stuff you have to use, the better." I'm figuring it's going to be hard on my system after months of not taking even a cold pill, plus I don't want to get into the deep hard drug-induced sleep and remind myself what actual relaxation feels like. That's a path better left un-taken, considering there is only one way for me to get to that level of relaxed.

But then the nurse tells me, if I want, they can skip the sedative altogether. Which was sucky. I mean, if they make me take something, I can be all, "I had to. It was surgery." But to actually give me the choice, kind of pissed me off.

I chose to take the sedative, because I remember how claustrophobic I was last time, but then it became my choice to take the drugs and I didn't like that. It was the right thing to do, in the end, or the surgery wouldn't have gone so smooth, but it sucked to have to make that call, even if it was for a surgery.

As it turned out, I was far less claustrophobic this time. Last time there were a bunch of nurses up in my space, constantly leaning over me, crowding me. And this time it was just the two doctors. I realized, sadly, that the issue was all the people crowded around me. I was keenly aware of the fact that as a kid, there was often a crowd of hospital people around me - doctors, nurses, med students - poking, prodding and usually holding me down. And just having that many people standing around me last time was far too familiar for my liking. This time went much better and now that I am aware of why, I can help limit my claustrophobia any future times.


While I laid there, I came up with several fan-fic story ideas. They probably suck, since I was tripping - (oh yeah, was I ever tripping.)


One idea was for a HS AU that I really want to write, but it will be like long and shit and ugh, I hate that.

One that I will never write, but while I laid there, the thought of schizophrenic teenage Dean entertained me.

One that mostly consists of this, "Ash isn't dead. Andy isn't dead. Hey, they can live in a van down by the river. And have butt-sex. I guess there can be a demon too."

And one Mike/Misha fic that I can't remember now, because while I was thinking about it, suddenly the Ms were in the boardroom at Wolfram and Hart and I was all, "Hey, this isn't a crossover fic! What the hell?! Oh. I must be dreaming." And then I woke up and couldn't remember the plot for the story.

Stupid brain.


So, anyway, my eye still hurts, but I can see now. And I'll be easing myself back into computer time. I've also decided to write 500 words every day, no matter what. That's about how much I can write in a half hour.

We'll see how long that lasts. Today I actually wrote 2,500 words (though I did it all without looking at the computer screen, to spare my eyes, and it seems to be badly typo-ed.) Doesn't matter, I'll fix it later, cuz it's totally done. A whole story. That is not any of the stories that I promised any of you. Because I am lame like that.

In Sum: Dear AMC, I will never again say, "Hey, American Movie Channel, why don't you ever run movies?" as long as you continue to bring us such fucking stellar programming as THE WALKING FUCKING DEAD, PEOPLE!!! WATCH THAT SHIT!!!

EDITED: To say thank you to everyone for all their support during my bad week last week and for all the well wishes and good luck on the surgery! My Flist rules! Thanks, peoples!
Tags: ash is my dead boyfriend, dean winchester - i'd tap that, fandom is made of awesome, friends 4evah, hello..., m2 is my otp, need story ideas like i need oxy, real life, stupid logical brain, the walking dead are coming!, word count total, writing blahblahblahing
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