Anyway, babycakes, I wrote you birthday fic. In response to your fic, Sliding. Hope it was the best day ever!
CW RPF starring Chad, Jared, Jeffrey, Jensen, Michael, Misha and some other people
5x If the Cast of the CW were a TV Show.
Title: The Transmission Of Dynamic Images Via Electromagnetic Signals
Fandom: CW RPF (in the style of Justified, Psych, Glee, Mad Men & Supernatural)
Category: 5x, AU, Fusion, General, Humor
Characters/Pairing: Chad, Jared, JDM, Jensen, Michael & Misha, plus etc.
Warnings: Harshing on New Jersey, Ridiculous Ridiculousness
Spoilers: Maybe a little for Season 1 of Justified & Season 1 of Glee.
Summary: 5x If the Cast of the CW were a TV Show.
Date Written: 06/15/2010
Word Count: 1,511 words.
Disclaimer: These people belong to themselves, sadly for me, because I would so make them re-enact this. The TV Shows referenced herein belong to their creators and the following networks - FX, USA, AMC, FOX & The CW. This story, however, is all mine and I sadly, make no money from it.
Author's Notes: So allamboy wrote this story, Sliding, wherein we got to see tiny little snippets of the J2 in various AU Worlds. It was wonderful but each glimpse into the worlds were far too short and made me feel like he was just teasing me (which he so was!). So I thought I’d repay the favor and give him five CW RPF glimpses of our favorite people on our favorite TV Shows.
Dedication: To allamboy, for his birthday. Even though you’re a big giant tease, I love you to smishy pieces. Kiss, Kiss, Baby. Hope it’s a good one.
To Uphold As Warranted
“And another thing…” Jim grumbled.
“I know, I know,” Jeff answered quickly. “Stop sleeping with Hilarie.”
“She’s the key witness in your shooting, Jeff,” and he pointed an accusing finger at the man. “You’d be wise to keep it zipped.”
Jeff laughed low in his throat and swallowed the last of his whiskey. “I’ll take it under advisement,” he drawled and slid his hat back onto his head.
“And stop drinking all my damn whiskey,” Jim added and snatched the bottle off the desk.
“Is Jeff being punished?” Jensen asked, and Jeff looked over his shoulder to see Jared and Jensen peeking around the corner of the doorway.
“Yes,” Jim told them. “He gets to spend the night locked in a surveillance van with you two idjits. Now everybody get the hell out of my office.”
“What?!” Jared cried. “He’s the one who shoots a guy and we get punished?”
“How is that fair?” Jensen squealed.
“Out,” Jim admonished and pointed his finger.
“Come along, children,” Jeff said, smirking and sauntering out of the office. “Let’s not make Daddy mad.”
“Remember how simple our lives were before Jeff came back to Kentucky?” Jared asked.
“This blows,” Jensen said.
To Excite Emotionally
Chad and Mike continued jumping up and down in the middle of the police station.
“You didn’t solve anything,” Jensen grumbled at them. “Stop jumping!”
“Yes, we did!” Chad told him and kept on jumping.
“I did all the work,” Jensen shot back.
“I found the witness,” Mike said, still jumping.
“And I put all the pieces together,” and Chad stopped jumping and threw himself at Jensen, wrapping one leg around the older man. “Admit it, Jenny, I solved the case better than you.”
“Get off me,” and Jensen pushed Chad backwards.
“It was kind of awesome, though, right?” and Chad grinned over at Jared and winked.
“You’re all idiots,” Jared said and stomped off to his desk.
“So, is that a yes to having dinner with me tonight?” Chad hollered after him.
“Ackles! Padalecki! My office. Now.” The chief stuck her head out of the office to glare at the room in general.
“Hey, Chief Smith,” Chad called and waved.
“Murray, I don’t believe I’ve hired you for a case. So get the hell out of my station house. Now.”
“’K, Chief, will do,” Chad called back.
“Dude,” Mike whispered. “We just solved that case. We need to get paid.”
“We need to get paid now.”
“Why?” Chad asked and grinned lopsided at his friend. “You got a Geek Gathering to go to? Gonna get your picture taken with Chekov or the Russian guy?”
Mike turned on his heels and stomped towards the exit. “Chekov is the Russian guy, Chad!”
“What? I thought Scotty was the Russian guy? Hang on. Wait up,” and Chad went trailing after him. “Don’t be like that, Mikey. Come on. I’ll wax your head.”
Open Delight Or Pleasure
“This is stupid,” Jensen grumbled.
“You’re stupid,” Jared told him.
“Don’t you have to go make eyes at your obnoxious girlfriend?” Jensen asked.
“Guys,” Misha sighed in exasperation, “Can we just focus for two seconds, please?”
“What do you want from us, Mr. Collins? It’s not like it’ll matter if we give it our all or not. We suck,” and Mike flipped his scarf around his neck and rolled his eyes.
“I just want to know when you all decided to just give up,” Misha said and looked to the room for answers. “Anyone? Sophia, how about you?”
“I’m just here to show my cleavage, Mr. C,” she said and stared at her fingernails.
“I should have stuck with football. At least then I didn’t look so stupid,” Tom answered.
“You’ve won one game this year and you only did that because you danced on the field,” Traci reminded him and adjusted her sparkly vest.
“And you looked pretty damn stupid,” Mike added.
Tommy punched him in the arm.
“Come on, you guys,” Genevieve cried and stood up from her chair. “Mr. C is right, it’s like we’ve all just given up. Chorus Wave is better than this. It’s our heart that makes us better. We can ride this bull. Take it by the horns. Won’t let it buck us off.”
“I’m confused,” Chad said. “Are we doing a matador number? Oh, oh, are we going to a rodeo?! I like rodeos.”
Sophia patted his leg. “I’ll explain later, sweetheart.”
“Okay,” Chad said brightly and put his head down on Sophia’s shoulder.
“I think you guys need to do a number about defying the odds,” Mr. Collins said and then turned to Genevieve before she could speak. “A group number, Gen. Not a solo.”
Genevieve pouted and took her seat again.
“Can we do Abba?” Mike asked, excited. “Or Lionel Richie? Or Huey Lewis and the News?”
“How about Starship?” Tommy asked mockingly.
“Yes!” Mike cried and tried to get a fist bump.
No one noticed Misha had exited the room, muttering to himself, “I was an intern at the White House. I can handle a glee club,” and then banged his head against the first locker he found because taking over glee club from Kripke had been the stupidest idea in a long line of stupid ideas.
A Person Who Behaves As If Insane
“This is bullshit,” Chad grumbled and pushed past Jeff and Danneel, who were standing in front of the conference room door. Jeff was trying to put his hands on her hips and look down her busty red dress and she was pushing him away and saying “You’re married and I’m engaged.”
“Bullshit,” Chad hollered, when he spotted Jensen sitting at the head of the conference table.
“Good morning to you too, Murray,” Jensen drawled and didn’t look up.
“Padalecki gets an account?” Chad hollered and waved a piece of paper at Jensen. “He’s your secretary, for Christ’s sake! Are you making him a junior copy-writer?”
“I’m sitting right here,” Jared said from the other end of the room, but Chad ignored him.
“It’s one account,” Jensen said and finally looked up, exasperation written all over his face.
“I can handle that account,” Chad told his boss and looked steely-eyed right back at him.
“First of all, you have a job. And second of all, it’s a shampoo account. Now sit down.”
“You have like a half-inch of hair,” Michael said from his spot at the table.
“Looks whose talking, baldy,” Chad shot back. “I can do more than wine-and-dine clients. Why is that my only job?”
“They like you,” Jeff said, coming up behind Chad. Danneel sauntered in after him.
“You take them to strip clubs,” Michael added helpfully.
“Are we starting now?” Misha asked with a bored air. “Can we please talk about getting me an actual office?”
“What do you need an office for?” Jeff asked and took his place next to Jensen at the head of the table.
“I’m the head of Television. I need a place for my, I don’t know, TV.”
“You don’t have a TV,” Jensen said and motioned to Jared to start taking notes.
“You don’t have a TV?” Michael said in disbelief.
Misha shrugged. “I’m eccentric.”
“You guys,” Richard gasped, as he came skidding into the room. “Tommy just went into Glover’s office with his shoes on.”
“Is he going to get fired?” Jeff asked, only slightly interested.
“No,” the room echoed at once.
“Because he’s pretty,” Michael added for emphasis. “The prettiest of all of Glover’s secretaries yet.”
“Didn’t you used to be Glover’s secretary?” Chad asked and took his seat.
“I need an office!” Misha cried.
Being Above Or Beyond What Is Natural
“Dude!” Jensen shrieked. “The hell, Misha?!”
“I didn’t want to wake you. You looked so peaceful.” Misha sat perfectly still on the side of Jensen’s bed.
“So you thought you’d just sit and stare at me like a freak?”
“You’re a freak as well, Jensen. We’re all freaks in this crazy world.”
“Have you’ve been hanging out at Buddhist temples again, man?”
“Would you two shut up?” Jared grumbled from the other bed. “Some people just got the shit kicked out of them by a wendigo and would like to get some sleep sometime this century.”
“Is everything alright, Jared? You seem upset,” Misha said in the direction of the lump that was his friend.
Jared burrowed further under the covers. “Go make eyes at Jensen someplace else, please.”
“Don’t listen to him, Mish. He’s just upset because the ghost of Jeffrey just called and yelled at him to cut his hair. It was weird.”
Jensen’s phone rang out in the silence that followed. He fumbled for it and looked at the caller ID.
“Shit, it’s Sam.”
“Did you not inform her that you were back from Hell?” Misha asked.
“Um, I wasn’t in Hell, Mish,” Jensen answered and furrowed his brow.
“You were in New Jersey. Is there a difference?”
Jensen shrugged. “Yeah, well, where was I gonna go? Detroit?”