So, when I went to therapy on Thursday, Kevin was in the workout room when I went in the back, setting up another patient.
K: I'm sorry I canceled on Tuesday, I was so sick.
Me: Yes, how dare you be sick.
K: Shut up, I just didn't want to get you sick.
Me: Didn't I tell you this was gonna happen? What did I say last week - that you were pushing yourself too hard and you were gonna end up flat on your face and look what happened.
K; Yeah, thanks, I need another mother.
To which I just gave him my best bitch-face and pointed my finger at him.
I wonder what the other patient thought of that exchange. Kev’s been lecturing me for years, I figure it's fair turn around now that I'm all grown-up that I can lecture him back. Of course, he still gets on my case. A while ago, when I was listening to my headphones out in the workout room, waiting for him to come over, and I had the volume all the way up, this conversation took place…
K: I could hear that music all the way over at my desk. You're gonna go deaf.
M: Maybe I wanna go deaf. It’s my prerogative.
K: Yeah, well, as your pretend foster father, it's my prerogative to yell at you about it.
Then, before my brain could pick which inappropriate ‘daddy’ joke I wanted to make, he goes...
K: Wait...that makes me sound really old. Can we go with foster brother instead?
Me: So, does that mean I get to beat you with sticks like I do my actual brothers?
K: What? No. No, because I am choosing to be your family based on my emotions and feelings for you. So…no.
Me: Dude, family is family and in my family, we show our love and affection by beating each other with sticks. (yeah, I totally ruined the moment).
At which point he tried to shove me off the giant balance ball (which, okay, is his job, but whatever) and then laughed hysterically when I cursed at him, so I guess he's got this brother thing down pretty good. And to be fair to my family, we were kids when my siblings and I used to chase each other around the yard with giant sticks, but still.
And now Kevin and I have had our last therapy session together. He is off for a few weeks and then he is opening a new clinic, like 45 minutes away from where I live, so there is no way I am making that trek. Also, suckage, once the clinic gets up and running in a few months, he is taking Cherie with him. He better not take Cute Guy too or there will be some ass-kicking.
But not to worry, I'm sure I'll still have stories to share. When I came back into his life, after ten years or so of being gone, he pulled me aside one day and said, "Listen, no more disappearing on me, okay? Promise me it's not going to be another decade like that ever again." When he told me he was leaving for the other clinic, I made him promise the same thing.
And I still have to continue on at therapy (am currently waiting for a new script) and after much debate and slight possessiveness, Kevin finally picked who he wants me to work with when I come back. We’ll see how that goes.